Forbearance

However much our plans and priorities in life might conflict with what the universe presents to challenge us, forbearance is a very important quality. One of the elements we have indulged too much down here (in the mundane world) is backwardness. We worry about how we were treated in the past; we worry about how we have treated our neighbors in the past. However, transcendence is always an option.

Sometimes I consider myself to be richer than Bill Gates. I have been granted visions in this life that astound me, and I have, in my efforts to correspond with religious authorities, found a confidence that lifts me above judgment in its aspect of right vs. wrong. My greatest “wealth,” though, has been the identification of my angels. I spent years working with my angels when they assumed forms I could never have recognized as being connective with, what to speak of identical to, persons I had known at this level of this life.

I'm in a stronger, safer place now than ever before. I know that at the level of eighth angel, my two heart level alter-egos have already reintegrated into one self, as I am now. I know that my seventh angel is a man I have trusted and respected all my life (Sam Welker), and that at the communicative throat level of what our life is, we will forbear together until we reach that place where we can finally reintegrate as one self, probably thousands of years from now.

I know that my sixth angel is the woman with whom I found truest love in this life. Most women I've tried to get serious with have told me that I seem to live in a dream world rather than in reality. I will never “stand down,” not even to a woman I love, but I have yet to encounter that expectation from Heather Michelle Shepherd. I know that she has the dignity that any woman would have, where considering the norms of society and how a potential partner would live up to those norms, but a special type of compassion and understanding is what I have found with her.

Forbearance is my focus at the moment. I wish I could be all things to all people, but truly, I would be making progress if I could be one or two things to one or two persons. I'm simply grateful that I have found the opportunities to share ideas and feelings the way I have so far. I still hope I'll marry Heather some day in this life, and I will never stop pursuing communications with Sam so long as he accepts my reason for connective interest with him.